A Busy 54 Days

So will they be good, or will they be disappointing?

A lot of that is in my hands.  I have my Carmen concert.  With or without a cast, even, Heaven help us, without a tenor (I am pretty sure now I will have a narrator and I have an accompanist) this show will go on!

I had a good runthrough of "Chanson Boheme" at the producer's apartment.  Finally I was able to air the subject of dark versus bright vowels and I explained about my teacher wanting me to sing dark vowels so that I can make a big space for the higher notes.  She said she understood that, but that I didn't need to do it in middle voice, which I suppose is true.  She is very invested in my pronouncing the French in a nasal way, like spoken French, which she says  makes Carmen seem more "witchy".  What I love so much about these sessions is that I get to delve into some of the nonmusical aspects of creating a performance and creating a character, which engages my imagination, which is something that happens all too rarely (if I tell you about the hundreds of posts I've seen over the past month about whether to use one or two spaces after a period, coming from people who work in the industry in which I earn my living, you will understand how arid and meaningless that world is and why I despair so much of the hours I spend in it).

I am also reading through the novella looking for sections that match the sung selections we will be presenting.  The producer thought it might be good if I read one of them in conjunction with singing "Chanson Boheme" at her musicale. So that will give me a chance to do something new, and to work on my speaking voice, which I have never used properly.

We also got the choir schedule going through Good Friday.  We will be singing "pieces by Mendelssohn".  So does that mean Elijah?  I remember when the choir sang an excerpt from Elijah last spring, I sang "O Rest in the Lord".  People (including the choir director) really seemed to like it, but afterwards he said something interesting.  We were talking about how wonderful the oratorio was and he said, "Well, maybe you can make that one of your next projects".  He didn't say "We are going to be doing something from Elijah on Good Friday and I hope you can sing something."  So what was that supposed to mean?  When I got the schedule this morning I wrote back to him saying that if we were doing something from Elijah I would very much like to sing something, either one of the two arias, or even just a recitative or maybe participate in a small ensemble.  I also said that I had been "disappointed" the last two years that there hadn't been anything for me. The Brahms Requiem does not have anything for a mezzo, but the year before we did the St. Matthew Passion which had a number of nice things for mezzos including a duet which was sung less than stunningly by two women from the church that shares our building. I think I was particularly upset because that year (the St. Matthew year) I had asked if there were any solo opportunities on Good Friday and he said no. I don't want to say that he "lied" to me, because it is hard to imagine someone as devout and truly good as this choir director "lying", but something was not on the up and up.  Anyhow, my friend "Abby" (not her real name) who comes from what she has called "hillbilly" stock has an expression she uses "don't borrow trouble". so I need to just chill out and see what is what.

I find it so hard to tread that line between being "pushy" and going after what I want.  I was thinking that I shouldn't "bother" the choir director tonight after rehearsal (he may not have gotten my email or may have decided to ignore it) but on the other hand if I don't say something the opportunity may be lost.  And I don't have a plan B.  I really have nothing else to do with myself during that period other than, perhaps, find excuses to go to rehearsals for Carmen instead of choir rehearsals if I'm only a chorus member.  Then I can just pretend I'm one of these "ringers" who shows up without rehearsing much and at least have a choral part under my belt for future use.

On the other hand I may be pleasantly surprised.

Tonight we are doing the piece by Britten (which I intend to do more work on later) and the other hymn with the solo that isn't.  How ironic that the text to it is "Ask and it shall be given you."  If only.

ETA: So tonight I asked the choir director about singing "O Rest in the Lord" or something else from Elijah on Good Friday (he had not gotten my email yet).  He said he would have to see if it fit in with the Passion story (if not, there is another short aria "Woe Unto Them").  He said he didn't know if there would be an appropriate spot for either of these but that maybe I could sing "O Rest in the Lord" on Maundy Thursday.  I also think we had a fruitful brief discussion about the fact that if there are going to be solos they should be more evenly divided up among voice parts.  So now I just have to turn things over, learn my music, and work on Carmen.