My partner now has Medicaid (it's what's called "Community Medicaid") however no nurse assessment has been forthcoming.
I used up almost all her discretionary income paying the private aide and then raised $2000 on GoFundMe which paid for the last 8 days (she is currently in a nursing home in Queens). I was tearfully astounded at how many people contributed to the campaign. This touches on my seemingly contradictory statements that I have no close friends but do have a social life (someone accused me of "arguing" when I said both those things at different times and I was quite surprised that she did not understand that "close friends" and "a social life" are not synonymous).
So many people (I know) do care about me and are able to provide sympathy, advice (if I want it), a hug, even money, but no one has time. I am not a priority with anyone. I have no "in case of emergency please notify". Everyone is busy with their jobs, family, family-related travel, or travel for pleasure. A point of comparison is that over 20 people gave money to the campaign, but only two people provided helping hands, and this over a period of now five months.
How things got to where they are now, is that my partner began acting oddly (the aide said she had Alzheimers) and was very listless, so we had a doctor come to the house and he said she needed to go to the ER. She was discharged after 48 hours and not formally admitted, so she could not go back to the nursing home on the Upper West Side where she had been. They wanted to send her home, despite her lack of money for home care, but I screamed and sobbed, so finally they found a spot for her in a nursing home in Queens. Yesterday I heard from the home care agency. I hope they come evaluate her and she can come home with help. She can't stay in the nursing home in Queens (it takes me two hours to get there and two hours to get back, and there's noplace to buy anything decent for lunch) and anyhow, she can't transition onto "nursing home Medicaid" yet (I don't want to say too much about that in a public blog). My long-term plan is for her to go home, and then if she has another medical crisis, for me to find a way to get her back into the nursing home on the Upper West Side. I think she realizes that she won't be able to be home forever.
As for singing, well, I had to miss choir rehearsal last Thursday because that was when she was being transferred to Queens. But I do practice every day, even if it's just for a half hour. My upper register that I've fought so hard for is still there. I am probably singing the soprano part in "Glory of the Lord" from the Messiah, which we are doing in two weeks.
I have one or two tentative solos for Lent/Holy Week. One thing I like about this new Minister of Music is that he contacts all the soloists ahead of each season with available dates and asks us each to pick one or two choices. That feels better than having the onus always on me. I said my first choice was singing "Qui Sedes al Dextram Patris" on Maundy Thursday, otherwise I said I would sing on April 2 at 11 when there doesn't seem to be anything scheduled. Based on the reading for that service, I thought I could sing "Patiently I Have Waited for the Lord" from the Saint Saens Christmas Oratorio. It's not Christmassy at all. And speaking of Saint Saens, one little known opera that I have always loved is Henry VIII. The role of Anne Boleyn is for a heavy lyric or a dramatic mezzo and she has a gorgeous aria. It has a sustained high B flat, but I think I could sing that now. And I was able to download the score for free! I still have not felt like making concert plans; I want to have something settled about my partner's care, but I will do that eventually.
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