Still Can't Find a Peer Group

I have a few minutes to kill before meeting my partner at a museum to commemorate my first Mother's Day without my mom, and probably should be working, but there didn't seem to be enough time, so I'm writing about a major concern here. In a way it's like throwing something out into the great unknown, because I don't get that many comments, but I'm just not up for using the Forum any more - because I couldn't find a peer group there either and just ended up envying everyone.

What do I mean by a peer group?

Classically trained singers who are older (40 plus or better yet 50 plus), who are studying seriously and singing better and better. Singers who, as the esteemed Cindy Sadler tactfully has said "still have work that needs to be done", but who are on an upswing, not a downswing.

So, for example, even though at 60 I don't sound as polished as 90% of the people I sing with at a Meetup, I sing better than I did at 55 or 57.

People who are hungry to sing opera rep in front of people but don't have $300 to plunk down to sing with a pay-to-sing group (or the time to rehearse several nights a week). People who would be eager to help me plan a concert of operatic scenes and arias at a reasonably-priced venue because it's not likely they'll get to sing this rep in public anywhere else but it's rep that they can sing, maybe not with 100% technically perfect sound all the time, but certainly well enough that it's not "cringeworthy".

Who Have I Met So Far?

1. Young people (under 40) who still think they can have careers.
2. People over 40 who are in demand on the high level amateur full-length opera production circuit and who occasionally sing in D houses. Many of these have managers or agents. These people have all known each other for years.
3. People over 50 who are winding down, who don't think they sing as well as they used to. These people have all known each other for years also.
4. Amateurs who are just really amateurs and wouldn't be able to sing the kind of opera rep I can sing even if they've had a few lessons.

I think I'm really angry at my teacher. He got all excited when I told him about the concert venue and now he's backing out. I know he sings one or two concerts a year with friends of his who are all his age (they mostly fit criteria 2 or 3). He has never invited me even though he admitted I sounded better than one of the mezzos he did invite to replace his wife when she was ill.

Now he says he doesn't know if he wants to do this concert because he doesn't know how he'll be sounding. Well why doesn't he just sing some of the things he sang in his last concert a few months ago?

So now it's all on me again and I really would like it if someone else would plan something for a change.

I am also, I guess, angry at the man who reached out and offered to help me, which I suppose is ungrateful. I believe he really will help me market the concert if I pull it together but all I wanted was for him to invite me to sing something in one of his concerts.

I feel like such a wallflower. I know that I sing well enough to be on the program at one of these kinds of things but no one invites me.

I went to those meetups at people's suggestion but I didn't meet anyone who was interested in doing anything with me.

I feel like a girl (I'm dating myself here I guess) who keeps asking people to dance and they say "ok" or "maybe" but no one asks her.