Everyone Loves an Angel

Yesterday I sang Wagner's "Angel" song in church during communion.  That is a "milestone" piece for me because it was the second solo I sang after being "discovered".  Although I date my transformation from the date of "Mon Coeur" (February 15, 2004), as I wrote about here, I was actually "discovered" the summer before, singing from a hymnal in the back of the church. The first solo I was given was "Dido's Lament" for "Day of the Dead" (the Unitarians' answer to "All Souls Day") and the second was "The Angel", which I was assigned to sing on Christmas Eve. I never liked German lieder and still don't much care for the "An Die Musik" sort but this is different. Of course when I sang it on Christmas Eve 2003 I had no idea how to sing it and I am sure I bellowed my way through it.

It was also the first solo I sang at the Lutheran church, Christmas Eve morning of 2006.  It has come a long way since then.  I wasn't 100% happy with the top G in the actual performance church service, probably because I was afraid I wouldn't have the energy to make it up there, so I gave it that little extra "push" that it didn't need.

But I got more compliments on this from people in the choir and the congregation than I have on any singing in recent memory.  Was that because I really sang that much better than usual?  Or because they liked that piece?  Or because an Angel was a perfect response to the tragedies of the weekend?

What is so ironic is that, like the Susanna with the heart of a Lady Macbeth and the Goro with the heart of a Manrico, I find myself spending most of my time singing "angelic" church music when I have the soul of Dalila.

I who so love flaunting my cleavage spend most of my singing time either in a choir robe or a long black skirt and top with a high neck!

This weekend my SO referred to me as "angelic".  Most  likely because I got her a cat, which I will pay for.  I pay for the cat because he is there for me to enjoy as well as for her to enjoy, much as I pay for her cable tv so I can watch it.  I mean if I am going to engage in charitable giving, I would rather give to someone I know and love than to strangers, even if it is not tax deductible.  And yet I feel all of this has happened by default.

So many of us end up with things other people are impressed by that we never wanted or aspired to.  Many divas, for example, are not really divas at all, they just have extraordinary voices and by dint of that and hard work, ended up singing at the Met, but I don't think they all enjoy all that media hype.  So I never aspired to virtue, but people see me as virtuous because I pay for things for my SO and sing in a church for free.

I remember one of the early times I sang "Mon Coeur" (this was after that fateful February) someone came up to me afterwards and said I was so seductive and then quickly said I was such a good actress. My feelings were hurt because I had hoped they would say something like "perfect typecasting".  Don't people know that it's when I look angelic in a choir robe that I am acting?

In other news, the videographer said that she didn't know about putting the "Angel" on Youtube because she was far away, and as I was singing during communion, there were a lot of visual and auditory distractions (she said you could hear "body of Christ", etc. as a sort of counterpoint).  Anyhow, she said she would send it to me and if I like it I will email it to friends and that she will try to come to a rehearsal of my next solo ("Andaluz" by Joachin Nin, for Epiphany) and tape me from close up.

Last but not least, I have been trying and trying to take a sexy picture of myself with my new smart phone.  This is the best I have been able to come up with so far.

I don't know why, but when I upload it, it ends up sideways, which I actually like.  It looks like I am lying down!

Angel or devil?