I guess life is "the bitter and the sweet", hence my repeated use of this post title.
First the bitter (because I'm writing about events in chronological order).
Sunday afternoon I went to an anniversary service for my church's former pastor (the tall, drop dead gorgeous blonde) at her new church, and guess who was singing? Little Miss. I was in shock. I had expected maybe a soloist from my pastor's new church, or their choir, but no, there was Little Miss and her violinist boyfriend (whom I always had a great relationship with; he used to accompany me for solos with violin, like the Bach "Laudamus te").
I guess Pastor had invited them. And I suppose one reason was that she got a "twofer".
In all honesty, I can't say that I was upset that she didn't ask me, why should she.
I think I was upset because Little Miss represents everything I wish I'd had, wish I had, wish I'd done, and wish I'd been (or still was). First of all she's young and on an upward trajectory. She has been performing (not singing classical music, but singing) since she was in middle school. She's been disciplined, admired, curated, what you will, since then. Of course she put in the work. I will never say she got something for nothing. But it's often a feedback loop. You do well, people encourage you, you do better. You make friends and colleagues among those who do what you do, and that follows you into the future.
Now if you were to ask me if I think Little Miss will have a brilliant career and the world's greatest opera houses, I will probably say no. She is a generic lyric soprano. Where she is unusual, is/was in exhibiting such technical vocal perfection at such a young age. She sang the soprano solo in the Brahms Requiem five years ago, at the age of 20, in a totally flawless way, just sitting in a choir chair in a pair of jeans and tossing it off. She belts, she acts, she sings musical theater, she sings contemporary music. Probably if the New York City Opera were like it had been in the 60s, she could probably land a spot there. She has a "feel" for new music and opera in English that's a little bit like musical theater. And of course she has mentors. A famous voice teacher from a famous conservatory, a CV containing master classes and summer programs, and her boyfriend, who was a child prodigy with his own Wikipedia page and who has his finger in every possible kind of musical and theatrical pie.
Now I need to add here, as I have said before, that Little Miss is neither conceited nor Prima Donna-ish. She just is. She excels, she enjoys it, people gush, and she enjoys that, in a sort of innocent childlike way.
At the celebration on Sunday when I went to the party afterwards to give my regards to Pastor, I ran into Boyfriend and we chatted and then he mentioned that Little Miss was there and wanted to say "hello". So I did. I'm sure she was genuinely happy to see me.
So I ended up in a funk for the next day. There aren't enough hours in the day for me to give myself the kind of polish you get in a conservatory when you spend 8 years there and don't have anything else to worry about.
So on to the next thing. The Sweet. We had our last rehearsal for our recital and it went well. Really the only difficult thing I have to sing is the Bolena duet and it is going well. Not to jinx myself, but these days I seem to be able to confidently hold onto a high A for 8 counts without choking or panicking as easily as I used to be able to hold onto an F.
And when I was on my way to rehearsal yesterday, I got an email from a woman from another senior residence about doing a 30 minute demo recital. I had contacted her a while ago about doing a concert of some kind and she said she was a bit leery because the last time she had elicited feedback from the residents they had told her that they wanted more "nonclassical" music. So she said a compromise would be that I would do a half hour demo recital and she would ask for feedback. So I can have fun deciding what to sing (and I will ask my teacher if he wants to join me).
And I will order an anthology of songs by Alma Mahler. Monday night I went to the monthly free chamber music concert at my church (they bring in up and comings; sadly, nothing for the homegrown talent) and a woman sang two songs by Alma Mahler. The choir director (who runs this program) said I should look into singing some of them. I told him I had bought a book of songs by Fanny Mendelssohn but had not sung any of them; I said I couldn't find anything suitable for church. Well, maybe now with the Mahler, the Mendelssohn, and the anthology I bought of spirituals/art songs by Florence Price I can put together a recital of songs by women composers. Or maybe just add a set to my nursing home recital program. If I want to do a whole program of songs by women I would have to find an appropriate venue and nothing comes to mind.
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